mosses monday XXV...

i think, in my heart, i knew that when i kissed mrs. moss "goodbye" that day, it was for the last time...

~@~@~@~@~@~




when the phone rings before dawn, it is rarely a good thing; but it rang very early that summer morning all the same...

~@~@~@~@~@~

i answered.

"dani, this is jean. mr. moss wanted me to call and let you know that mrs. moss passed away during the night, sweetie."

"oh," i felt my heart sinking.
"is mr. moss alright; is there anything i can do?"

"he's alright, dani," she responded.
"he's just waiting for his secretary and lawyer to get here so that the two can take care of all the funeral arrangements."

"jean, will you please tell him that i love him,"
my voice broke.
"oh, and jean, thank you for letting me know."

i held the phone receiver in my lap and just sat there with tears streaming down my face. i knew mrs. moss was in a much better place. but, my heart was breaking all the same. it was a huge step for mr. moss to have to institutionalize mrs. moss; i was afraid this was just going to be too much for him.

~@~@~@~@~@~

after a bit, i placed the receiver back on its cradle, washed my face and brushed my teeth and hair, and dressed. i woke up katherine and got her ready for the day, and we headed down to the moss' court.

when i pulled into the drive i found jean sitting outside the backdoor reading the newspaper. she arose and walked over to greet me at my van. i got out of the van, and we hugged. i told her i was really worried about mr. moss. she assured me he was doing fine but that he was bathing and shaving.

(with moss' parkinson's disease, it usually took him a couple of hours to get ready each morning. given that he had recently broken several of his vertebrae, it was taking him even longer to do so.)

i didn't want to interrupt him.

so, jean and i just stood in the drive and talked. she described the events of the night prior and assured me that mrs. moss hadn't suffered... rather, she'd just died in her sleep.

i was so thankful she hadn't suffered;
she'd already suffered emotionally more than her fair share!

after talking to jean for a bit, i got back into my van and very slowly drove up and around the moss' circular drive. as i did so, i took special notice of the flower gardens... my last conversation with mrs. moss had been about her beloved geraniums, petunias, rhodi's, and azaleas...

as i was circling, a feeling of joy overtook me...
i had a sense she was looking down upon the flowers...
and enjoying them with me!!!

the way she always did before alzheimer's took her away from us...

~@~@~@~@~@~

(to be continued...)

love and God's blessings,
dani xx

ps you will find earlier entries in ascending order on my side bar entitled, "our love story":)