on a very serious note...

(Frequently breaking into sobs, Leroy Hubley testified Tuesday about the death of his wife, Bonnie, who died a month before their son, Randy, after they both received contaminated heparin at the same kidney dialysis clinic..)

i was watching a CNN WORLD NEWS REPORT earlier this evening (tuesday:us) when a reporter started recounting several testimonies that had taken place today before congress about families who had lost loved ones as a result of contaminated heparin (a blood thinner in liquid form). i watched leroy hubley (in the ap photograph above) recount losing his wife and then a month later losing his son due to the contamination. the brokenhearted man could barely speak.

tears came to my eyes for him, and my heart felt like it was in my throat.

this particular story hit close to home for me. for i had to give myself heparin shots on several occasions as well as receive heparin drip iv's. after katherine was born, i started having mini-strokes and have been on coumadin (a blood thinner in pill form) since 1993.
i never felt the need to question either drug.


i just took for granted the safety of the medicine.

after the report, i sat thinking...
 i've shared this with only a handful of those near and dear... a little over a year ago, i offered to carry a baby for a beloved couple who had tried to get pregnant for nearly 15 years with no avail. she has been a dear friend and life-long mentor to me, and it was something i really, really wanted to do for her if she accepted my offer. i told her i would be willing to see a specialist as i knew i would have to switch from coumadin to daily heparin shots if the doctors allowed me to do it.  then, if the specialist gave the okay, i was more than willing to do this for them. 
as it turned out, the high risk pregnancy specialist ran some tests and told me it was just too risky. i was really upset for some time after that because after a lot of thought and prayer, i really had my heart set on it. not only would i have been able to help them, i would also have been making myself productive (pardon the pun).

i wanted my dear friend to experience the joy my katherine had brought to me!!! 
~@~

now, after watching the news, i feel that it was probably a GOD thing that we didn't go ahead with the surrogacy. i could not imagine them going through all that and then me losing their baby because of a contaminated drug... it is outrageous to me this day and time that our food and drug administration continually fails to do its job!

on tuesday, members of congress blasted the fda for approving scientific protein laboratories, a wisconsin company which owns the chinese-owned changzhou spl co. ltd., a heparin supplier, without inspecting it...
 TOO LITTLE TOO LATE, if you ask me!

and here's the real kicker, the fda believes that the contamination was deliberate!

~@~

my thoughts and prayers go out to all those who have lost loved ones due to this travesty.

GOD bless them and you too...

love, dani